


Sibling Rivalry (Oneshot)

by bethanyisinjail



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Family, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Kinda?, M/M, Meeting the Parents, Panic Attacks, Post Seven route, but no one is dating, im so sorry, just pain little happiness, mc doesnt even show up bruh where is she, saeran is a walking spoiler
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-08
Updated: 2020-09-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:39:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26354341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bethanyisinjail/pseuds/bethanyisinjail
Summary: Saeran has never really had a family, Saeyoung being more than enough for him. He loves Yoosung more than anything, but maybe he's not ready to meet his family right now. Or maybe his family isn't ready to meet him."“Hey Grace!” Yoosung greets, excited as always. Even if he does talk smack about her, he’s still excited to see her.“Hi Yoosung,”  She gives him a half-hearted wave, looking over to Saeran before looking him up and down quickly. He squeezes Yoosung’s hand. He’s so uncomfortable he’s so uncomfortable he’s so uncomfortable.“Hi?” She tilts her head him."
Relationships: 707 | Choi Luciel & Choi Saeran, Choi Saeran/Kim Yoosung
Comments: 2
Kudos: 35





	Sibling Rivalry (Oneshot)

**Author's Note:**

> yeah i wrote the 707 one before this and needed more angst bc i write angst duh-- so it's concentrated in this singular fic
> 
> sliiiiiight warning: it's saeran! so mentions of his mother and some of her horrible habits r here. just tryna be safe

Saeran is extremely nervous. Scratch that, Saeran is petrified. Yoosung’s parents and sister are coming into town tomorrow, and after having been dating for almost 6 months, Yoosung wants Saeran to meet them. Of course, Saeran could give Yoosung even the smallest inclination that he doesn’t want that and Yoosung would call it off in a heartbeat, but Yoosung is excited about it. And Saeran doesn’t want to ruin that.

He doesn’t know how family works. His father was never around, his twin brother was more like a protector throughout their childhood before turning into what he titled as a traitor for so long, and his mother-

God, his mother. Even the thought of her name brings such a painful onslaught of memories that time never seems to dull. His breathing picks up as images soar through his head. Her screaming, her flying hands, her kicking feet, her broken beer bottles. Soon enough he’s launched himself into a downward spiral, only fed by the initial fear of meeting Yoosung’s family.

A minute later Saeyoung walks into his room. “Hey, Saeran-” He stops himself when he sees his brother curled up, shaking on his bed. He rushes over to take a seat in front of him, “Hey hey hey, I’m right here ok?”

Saeran looks up and is able to register it’s his brother sitting in front of him. He nods, continuing to look up at him hoping somehow he’ll be able to mentally tell him he just wants to be held. By the only family he’s ever had.

“Breathe Saeran, in 4 out 4,” Saeyoung softly consoles, holding out his hands to him. He knows what his hands mean: If he’s comfortable with being touched he can take them. And considering that’s all he wants right now, he desperately grasps at his hands, action coming out a lot slower and weaker than he intended.

But Saeyoung gets a point, pulling Saeran into a tight hug. He exaggerates his breathing so Saeran can follow it. To which he does, and his shaking dying down with the evening of his breathing. He’s exhausted, but as much as he’s physically unable to even keep his arms around his brother his head is still flying far too fast.

Saeyoung sits back to look at Saeran, but Saeran protests. He shakes his head and forces himself to grab back at his brother, not wanting to let go. So Saeyoung settles for talking to him while he holds him.

“Saeran, what happened?” He quietly asks.

He shakes his head again, his response coming out as nothing more than a discarded breath. 

“It’s alright, take as much time as you need.”

Saeran collects himself enough to tell Saeyoung at least the skeleton of the story. “Yoosung’s family. Meeting them tomorrow. Though of-” He doesn’t need to finish the sentence, Saeyoung immediately holding him tighter. 

“I know. I think they’ll be just fine but,” He pauses, “I understand why you’re nervous. Do you really want to meet them?”

He doesn’t answer at first, genuinely stumped by his brother’s question. He doesn’t want to, technically. But he doesn’t wanna do a lot of things he does, it’s just about living in the discomfort until it becomes comfortable. But he also does want to meet them. For Yoosung’s sake. 

“A little bit of both?” Saeyoung asks, to which Saeran nods, “I trust Yoosung, he would die before he put you in a scenario that makes you uncomfortable. If you feel like you can’t do it yet, I think you should tell him.”

He shakes his head, “I can.”

“If you believe you can so do I,” Saeyoung sits back, and this time Saeran doesn’t feel the need to grab back on, “Maybe talk to Yoosung about it. Work out a compromise, or an unspoken signal you’re uncomfortable. Kinda like we have.”

He nods, “I will. Thank you.”

“I’ll always be here if you need anything at all,” Saeyoung rubs Saeran’s shoulder before going to walk out, only stopping in the doorway to say one last thing, “I’ll be in the computer room if you need anything.”

Saeran nods and Saeyoung walks out, not shutting the door behind him. He never shuts the doors after he finds Saeran like that. He wants to be able to hear if anything happens, at least a little better, from wherever he is.

He grabs his phone and checks the time. 1 am. It’s way too late to call Yoosung. Well, it’s too late for him to call Yoosung without feeling ridiculously guilty, even if Yoosung swears that he can call him whenever he needs anything. He settles for simply sleeping on it, settling into bed, and shutting the lights off, the only light in the room being the dim one showing through the crack of the door.

He feels it. He’s not going to sleep soundly. It’s been a year since he escaped Mint Eye, and at this point, he can feel when he’s going to be plagued by nightmares, fighting a losing battle for more than two hours of sleep.

But he’s at least going to try to get those hours.

***

His prediction was absolutely right. He’s actually pretty sure he only got closer to an hour, waking up from a particularly hellish nightmare he couldn’t work himself down from without finding Saeyoung. Now here he is, fully dressed and sitting on the couch, waiting for Yoosung to come to pick him up. His leg violently bounces up and down, eyes locked on the floor. He knows Saeyoung is leaning in the doorway of his computer room, his gaze fixed on him.

He jumps as someone knocks on the door. Yoosung. He goes to get up to open it but his body doesn’t listen. Saeyoung takes the hint and beats him to it, going over and opening the door instead.

Saeran knows they’re greeting each other but can’t really put in the effort to decipher what they’re saying. 

Moments later Yoosung walks over to him. “Hey Saeran,” He takes a seat on the couch next to him, “Are you alright?”

Saeran looks up at him and nods, “Yeah, I’m fine. Just nervous.”

“You don’t sound fine,” Yoosung cups a hand on the side of Saeran’s face, and Saeran watches as concern spreads across his expression, “We don’t have to if you’re not comfortable.”

Saeran shakes his head. He didn’t waste all this time worrying about it to chicken out now. He’s not weak, he can do it.

“Alright, come on,” Yoosung stands and holds out a hand to Saeran, “Let’s do this!”

Saeran lets out a small laugh at Yoosung’s excitement, taking his hand and using it to steady himself. They share their goodbyes with Saeyoung, who tells Saeran he’s free if he needs anything. The two get in Yoosung’s car, a hand-me-down from Saeyoung after Saeran and Yoosung started dating.

Yoosung starts the drive towards the hotel. The tension in the car could be cut with a butter knife, but it’s not between the two of them. Rather, it’s all coming from Saeran whose tension with himself is the true enemy.

“Saeran,” Yoosung looks over for a moment and smiles, “You know I wouldn’t mind if you said you didn’t want to meet my family, right?”

Saeran nods, “I know.”

“Would it help to hear a little bit about everyone beforehand?” He laughs slightly, “Well, more than I’ve already told you.”

“Yeah,” Saeran replies, “It would.” It isn’t a total lie, it is good to know what he’s getting into. But there’s an unspoken second reason for it, he just wants to listen to Yoosung’s voice. His neverending excitement always seems to make any subject better.

***

Yoosung pulls into a parking spot and any calm he collected completely abandons him. Yoosung turns the car off and looks over to Saeran, a sympathetic and concerned expression painting his face. Yoosung is extremely expressive making him very easy to read, even when Saeran can’t find the brainpower to do anything else.

Yoosung reaches into his pocket and digs for something, pulling out a piece of paper. He hands it to Saeran, “Here. If you need to get some air or you wanna go home, hand this to me.” 

Saeran takes the paper and puts it in his pocket. “Thank you,” He whispers, and Yoosung leans over and gives him a short kiss. His touch lingers, and it takes all Saeran has not to grab back onto him. Later, he reminds himself. 

They both get out and Yoosung grabs onto Saeran’s hand, both of them heading up to the hotel room. They reach the door and Yoosung knocks, Saeran’s grip so hard on his hand he’s surprised Yoosung hasn’t lost circulation. 

The door opens and two faces greet them, the woman very excited while the man looks less so.

“Yoosung! Hello!” Yoosung’s mother exclaims, drawing him into a hug.

“Hello there,” The man in front of Saeran greets, holding out his hand, “It’s nice to meet you.”

Saeran pauses a moment, process what he wants before realizing it’s a handshake. He reluctantly takes his hand from Yoosung’s and gives his father a handshake, overwhelmed by how firm it is. “You too,” He quietly replies, comforted when he feels Yoosung’s arm wrap around his shoulders. 

Mr. Kim looks unamused, but steps over to greet his son regardless. Shoot shoot shoot shoot- it’s been 2 minutes and he’s already messed up.

Mrs. Kim steps in front of him, giving him a soft smile and also extending a hand. He shakes her hand, which is much less firm and scary than his father’s was. 

“It’s so nice to finally meet you, Saeran,” She says, “Yoosung always talks very fondly of you.”

He forces a small smile, unsure of how he is supposed to respond to that. She doesn’t seem to be phased at all, instead walking into the hotel room further. 

“Come in both of you!” Saeran doesn’t move until Yoosung grabs his hand and leads him in. 

The hotel is a suite, with a small living room and kitchen area in the front. There’s a door at the back, likely with a bed. The door is shut, however.

Yoosung leads the two of them over to the couch, taking a seat so Saeran can sit on the end. They’re practically on the corner of the sectional, so only the two of them can fit on that part. He mentally thanks him for it, not wanting to have to sit next to anyone but him.

Both his parents take a seat next to one another next to Yoosung. “It’s been such a long time since I’ve seen you, Yoosung!” His mother pinches his cheek and he protests by pulling his head away, “And now you brought a boyfriend with you. My goodness, how things change.”

“Mama!” He whines, “I’m 21!”

“Doesn’t change that you’re my baby,” She gushes before looking to Saeran, “I’m guessing Yoosung has told you all about us.”

Saeran nods.

“Did he shame his sister the entire time?” She asks, to which he nods again, “He seems to have a vendetta against her, she’s not as bad as he probably made her out to be.”

“You just say that because Grace visits you more often!” He protests.

His mother sighs, “Yoosung.”

“Sorry, sorry,” He groans. Saeran almost can’t believe he is treating his mother the way he is. It’s not that she did anything to deserve it or he is doing anything horribly wrong, he just sometimes forgets this is what a normal family dynamic looks like. He doesn’t even wanna think about what his mother would do. Nope, not thinking about it.

Someone knocks on the door, causing Saeran’s head to snap over. Mrs. Kim jumps up to answer the door, greeting her daughter with a hug as she walks in. She gives Saeran a stare for slightly too long for his taste, immediately setting him farther on edge than he originally was. She greets her dad before taking a seat between her parents. 

“Hey Grace!” Yoosung greets, excited as always. Even if he does talk smack about her, he’s still excited to see her.

“Hi Yoosung,” She gives him a half-hearted wave, looking over to Saeran before looking him up and down quickly. He squeezes Yoosung’s hand. He’s so uncomfortable he’s so uncomfortable he’s so uncomfortable. “Hi?” She tilts her head him. 

Saeran can only muster a wave, his boyfriend luckily taking over for him, “Oh, Grace, I didn’t tell you. This is Saeran, he’s-” He hesitates, “He’s my boyfriend.”

Her face twists in even further confusion, “What? Why was I not told this?”

Her mother puts a hand on her shoulder, “Calm down, Gracie, we didn’t plan it until a couple of days ago. Plans change.”

She shakes her head. “I just figured maybe,  _ maybe _ , I would be told this?” She looks back to Saeran again, clearly still taking him in, before looking to Yoosung, “I don’t think mom and dad know you literally don’t talk to me. I didn’t even know he existed.”

“It’s not like you tell me about all your relationships either!” Yoosung shoots back.

“This is apparently long term if he’s meeting your family,” She argues back, “Granted, he hasn’t said anything to me-”

“Grace!” Yoosung cuts her off before she can say something worse, letting go of Saeran’s hand in favor of pointing at her. He needs his hand back. He needs it back, he needs it back before he starts to float off into the world of what-ifs. He grabs back at it when Yoosung drops is back to his side, yet anxiety still eats at him. But he’s not going to use his escape card. He’s been here for 10 minutes max. It’s way too soon. 

“Calm down,” Their mother softly scolds both of them.

“Some things never change,” Mr. Kim groans.

“I think I have a right to know this before visiting my parents for the first time in months,” Grace holds up her hands in defense. 

“You saw them like two months ago!” Yoosung corrects her, “I haven’t seen them in almost a year!”

“So?” She snaps at him, “That’s on you!”

“No, it’s not,” He denounces, “You traveled here, you know how far I am! And I’m still in school!”

“That shouldn’t-”

“Stop!” Their father yells, shutting both of them up. He says something after it but Saeran goes completely blank. His mother’s face replaces Mr. Kim’s for a moment too long, and his breathing pretty much stops. No one is looking at him, they don’t seem to notice amidst their argument. But he needs to get out, or he’s going to suffocate in here. 

The paper. Give Yoosung the paper. He shoves his hand in his jacket and grabs it, hand shaking so much he has to have a death grip on it so he doesn’t drop it. He takes his other hand out of Yoosung’s, catching his attention, and replaces it with the small piece of paper. Yoosung grabs his phone to do some escape plan but when he looks up to Saeran he abandons it. He grabs onto his hand and walks him out into the hallway without a word to his parents or sister. They stop arguing and stare. 

Saeran practically falls against the wall, using whatever remaining physical stamina he’s not putting to shaking, hyperventilating, or clutching at his stomach to keeping himself on his feet. Yoosung catches how unstable he is and wraps a hand around his waist to support him.

“We’re in the hallway, Saeran, it’s ok,” He whispers to him, “Can I see your hand?” Saeran gives Yoosung his hand and he puts it to his chest, “Match my breathing, ok?” Saeran nods.

Yoosung takes exaggerated and slow breaths, encouraging Saeran as he works to match them. Finally, he’s breathing again, but he still needs Yoosung to stand. He’s surprised when Yoosung reaches up and brushes tears off his face. He doesn’t remember when he started crying.

“I’m so sorry for not realizing you were uncomfortable,” He softly apologizes.

Saeran shakes his head, “Not your fault.”

Yoosung looks back to the door before sighing, “Let’s go, I don’t wanna you to go back in there right now.” 

Saeran complies, allowing Yoosung to help him down the hallway into the elevator. They ride it down and make their way through the lobby and out the front door, Yoosung helping Saeran into the car. As much as his boyfriend gets tunnel vision sometimes, he’s still so grateful for him.

Yoosung gets in the driver’s seat, shutting the door but not starting the car. He instead looks over at Saeran, who is attempting to look like he doesn’t feel like he’s gonna pass out. He didn’t even realize he didn’t eat today. Or yesterday. Yeah, maybe that’s why he felt lightheaded walking out of the building.

“Saeran,” Yoosung catches his attention, “Have you eaten today?” Saeran shakes his head. “What about yesterday?” Saeran shakes his head again. 

“Sorry,” He whispers.

“You don’t need to apologize,” Yoosung cups a hand on his face and wipes away tears he, again, didn’t realize were falling. Yoosung gives him a kiss on the cheek, “I’m gonna bring you to my dorm, is that cool?”

Saeran nods, “Yeah.”

***

“Eat a little more,” Yoosung urges, clearly displeased he’s only eaten half a sandwich, “Pleaseeeee?”

Saeran looks over at him, who is pulling a sad puppy face. He takes another bite of the sandwich on the plate, which causes Yoosung’s face to change into a big smile. He eats a few more small bites until he feels like he’s gonna be sick if he eats anymore, at which point he puts the plate on Yoosung’s coffee table.

When he does, Yoosung takes the opportunity to throw his arms around him. It catches Saeran off guard but doesn’t scare him. He trusts being in Yoosung’s dorm alone with him more than he trusts being anywhere else. Here, he knows he’s safe. 

He wraps his arms back around him. “I’m sorry again, Saeran,” Yoosung whispers, guilt lining his voice.

“It’s really not your fault,” Saeran replies, “You didn’t mean to do anything bad.”

Yoosung shakes his head, “I should have been more aware. Especially since I know you weren’t comfortable meeting them in the first place.”

“You didn’t have to, we had a system for a reason,” Saeran reminds him, “If anything, it’s my fault for not saying anything until it got really bad.”

Yoosung sits up and brushes a piece of hair out of Saeran’s face, “Don’t blame it on yourself, it’s most definitely not your fault.”

Saeran yawns as he nods at Yoosung’s comment. 

“Are you tired?” Yoosung perks up, “You can stay that night! If- if that’s ok though!”

Saeran puts on probably his first genuine smile of the day, “I wanna stay the night, I’d rather be here than at home with Saeyoung.”

Yoosung giggles excitedly, getting up to grab clothes for Saeran. He hands a pile to him, and Saeran goes into the bathroom to change. Saeran isn’t comfortable yet changing in front of Yoosung, although they have been dating for almost 6 whole months. His body is covered in so many ugly scars, and as much as Yoosung wouldn’t mind, he’s not there yet. And Yoosung makes it quite clear that’s totally alright.

He throws on the sweatpants and sweatshirt Yoosung gave him. He loves wearing Yoosung’s clothes. Despite being older and taller than him, he’s too small for most of Yoosung’s clothes. But he likes the feeling of his stuff being big on him, not to mention it’s like carrying a small piece of Yoosung everywhere he goes. He already has stolen 3 of his sweatshirts which he wears when he can’t sleep.

He walks out, seeing Yoosung already propped up in his bed. Almost all the lights are off, save for the lamp on the nightstand. He climbs into bed next to Yoosung, reaching over and shutting off the lamp before lying to face him. He can see the excited expression on Yoosung’s face and his whole body seems to relax. He would never say it, but Yoosung being outwardly excited to do things with him makes him indescribably happy. The fact that someone is excited to see him still baffles him. 

Saeran, although hesitantly, moves forward and wraps his arms around Yoosung’s waist, burying his face in the crook of Yoosung’s neck. Yoosung wraps his arms around Saeran’s neck, absentmindedly playing with his hair. Normally, Saeran would be nervous, knowing he’s prone to nightmares. But he’s simply too tired to care, knowing he’s never safer than he is with Yoosung.

“I love you, Saeran,” Yoosung whispers, leaning back to press a kiss to the top of his head, “I love you so so much.”

Saeran doesn’t say anything, simply pulling Yoosung in tighter. Even after all this time, I love you’s don’t come easily to him. He was never told it, and he therefore never learned how to respond. But Yoosung understands that. He said that Saeran could never verbally respond to him ever and he would still love him. So, he almost never says it back.

Almost.

“I love you more, Yoosung.”

**Author's Note:**

> i dont know when the HELL in my life i decided yeah yooran but now i will go down with this ship


End file.
